Category Archives: Kill Yourself

Slacktivism

Now that I have appropriated the correct term for it, time to go on a rampage! Slactivism (noun): support of a cause with a political or social nature via the Internet (read: social media), thus requiring very little actual involvement … Continue reading

Posted in Assholes, Current Events, General Ranting, Hatred, Hipsters, Kill Yourself, Rage, Ugly People | 1 Comment

My Life Is Better Than Yours

Oh, what’s that? You take exception to the statement I’m making with the title of the weekly post on the hilarious and beloved blog that I co-run with one of my dearest and swarthiest chums? Well, what are you doing … Continue reading

Posted in 'Merica, Assholes, BroCast is Awesome, Celebration, Drinking, Happy Stuff, Kill Yourself, Marine Stuff, Nerd Stuff, Paul is Grumpy, Special Event, Spoiled Much?, Sunshine and Lollipops, Travel, Veterans | 4 Comments

All I Want For Christmas is WAR

If you’re one of the few people who still gets their news the old-fashioned way (overly-friendly white people in suits talking at you from the TV), or even the ancient way (newspapers written by people angry that they’re too ugly … Continue reading

Posted in Assholes, Celebration, Hatred, Kill Yourself, Lists, O Brave New World..., Paul is Grumpy, Rage | Leave a comment

A-Netflix-alyze This

Sometimes I wonder what the many people on the periphery of my life (such as the employees at the Starbucks I go to everyday, the vast majority of my coworkers, that shipwrecked family I hunted on my private island, etc) … Continue reading

Posted in Assholes, General Ranting, Happy Stuff, Hatred, Kill Yourself, Lists, Movies, Nerd Stuff, Paul is Grumpy, Sci-Fi, Work | 5 Comments

If You Want a Picture of the Future…

Imagine there being so many dance/talent shows on television that every single person in America is a contestant on one – forever. Imagine Taylor Swift getting dumped but instead of writing another generic pop-country song, she tears the man’s throat … Continue reading

Posted in Assholes, Breasts, childhood, Current Events, Death, Drinking, Famous People, Hatred, Headlines, Hipsters, Kill Yourself, Movies, Nerd Stuff, O Brave New World..., Paul is Grumpy, Quotables, Rage, Sci-Fi, SEX, Ugly People, Wacky Animals | 5 Comments

Things You Like Are Terrible

Earlier today I was chatting with one of our office’s current disposable menial laborers/unknowing organ farms (I believe the colloquial term for them is “summer interns”) about film school. Specifically, how terrible it is and that the rotten people who … Continue reading

Posted in Assholes, Drinking, Hatred, Hipsters, Kill Yourself, Lists, Movies, Nerd Stuff, Paul is Grumpy, Quotables, Rage, Veterans | 1 Comment

This is What it Sounds Like When Dudes Cry

Bros don’t emote. Not our thing. No surprise there. Sure, we express things like joy (“Whoo, breasts!”), excitement (“Whoo, breasts!”), hunger (“Whoo, breasts would go great with this sandwich!”), and even anger (“Where the hell are the breasts?!”) with ease … Continue reading

Posted in Breasts, Death, Famous People, Kill Yourself, Lists, Man-Tears, Movies, Nerd Stuff, Paul is Grumpy, SEX | 2 Comments